Echoes in Eternity

Chuck Norris turned 70 today. I don't know what's scarier, that he's 70 or that he could still beat up most 20-year-olds.

In honor of the great martial arts master, devoted Christian, and articulate conservative, here are a few facts you may not have previously known about Mr. Norris.

• Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
• Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.
• Champions are the breakfast of Chuck Norris.
• M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris can touch this.
• Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
• Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
• Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.
• Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
• Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
• Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.